In what ways might understanding grief assist individuals in dealing with loss?

Question

How does understanding grief help in coping with loss?

Answer 1

I wrote my first novel, "A Broken Hallelujah" to deal with my own grief and to explore how many types of grief affect our choices and life's trajectory. As my brother just passed last week, I am using that as a guide on how to move through it.

Comments

I am truly sad for your loss, keep him close in your heart.

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How and why did you loose your brother? I am so sorry.

Answer 2

Dr. O'Connor has a brilliant mind, such deep empathy, and a passion for this very sensitive topic. It was an honor to listen to her, learn from her, and to understand the complexities of the grieving process. Thank you Dr. Huberman for always bringing the best of the best to your podcast. As a psychologist myself, I appreciate all the "continuing education" I can get...just wish I got credit for it:)

Answer 3

I am learning how to live with the loss of my beautiful Frida, my soul-dog, my best friend ever. When I spontaneously start looking for her and then realize she is not here, I find her inside my heart.

Comments

I totally understand, I feel the same with my loss of my pets, being parrots, especially those that became ill and even with veterinarian intervention I couldn't save them... accept keep them cuddled with me until the end. Most people understand the grief of a dog or cat, but don't understand how precious birds are as well. I wish you the best in healing.

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Same. My brain still expects to see the dog chillin' in his crate when I come down the stairs every morning. I'll never forget how soft his ears were, and I'll always be looking for the light on his collar in the darkness when I sit on the back porch at night.

Answer 4

Every time I think, "that was, hands down, the best Huberman podcast yet!" you manage to find another amazing guest with such profound and insightful information ❤ Thank you so much for sharing Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor's wisdom and compassion with us.

Comments

Thank you!

Answer 5

I am grief right now. Over someone who is not dead. Over a relationship I chose to end and don't regret ending. But I still miss her and love her.

Answer 6

Thank you for posting this very important topic, Andrew.
O'Connor's book "The Grieving Brain" helped me immensely in understanding my process after the loss of my spouse. Grief is a continuous journey that has no end, but you do get better at navigating the course. Understanding how it affects you physically and neurologically offers you the grace you need to move onward with hope. I also lost my previous partner to suicide without a note -- I had to accept the fact that his decision was his alone and that I was a very small twig on a very large bonfire in his mind.

Answer 7

My father passed away last year, and recently I lost my dog, who meant the world to me. Thank you Dr. Huberman, for everything that you do.

Answer 8

I have lost both parents. My dad suddenly of an aneurysm 22 years ago. My mother 2 years ago to an adverse reaction to an RX—so a few months, but nothing like cancer or dementia where there’s extended planning/preparation time like with her siblings. For me, the sudden was worse. But there could be a few other factors like I was only 33, I am a daddy’s girl, and he was my first parent to go. Thank you for this episode!

Comments

Any lost life for any reason can be hard to take its someone you've loved and looked up to I feel your pain, but remember they wouldn't want you to not live and enjoy your life.

Answer 9

This is an extraordinary conversation. I have been in this field of grief for many decades both with my practice, my groups and in my own personal life. The depth and scope that Dr. Mary-Frances O'Connor brings to this discussion of grief and loss has touched me deeply. Dr. Andrew Huberman is a thoughtful and thorough and a wonderful presenter and interviewer, too. Thank you. I am passing this conversation on to those who need you - which is many. Kindly, Mary Jane Hurley Brant

Answer 10

I like forgetting and detaching sometimes certain people SHOULD NOT BE REMEMBERED !!!

Answer 11

No one tells you how to deal with the loss of your best friends as you get older. Person after person…

I broke up with a guy who has Alzheimer’s. I felt like a traitor. Our whole relationship was nothing but me becoming more and more his nurse not more of his lover… he kept changing so I basically kept losing him… our relationship was too short to survive… so painful

Answer 12

One of the best episodes - I enjoyed the speaker a lot

Answer 13

I cried through this entire episode.

Answer 14

I loved this episode. I loved your guest. So inspiring! Such an important subject to discuss.

Answer 15

I was getting weekly massages after my father passed. I needed touch but my heart was so broken, I didn’t want hugs—I just didn’t have the right people around me to get a pure agape love hug. The massage helped me transmute the pain from my grief into a loving remembrance. By healing my body, I was healing my broken heart.

Answer 16

I started a widow's group after losing my husband five years ago. I concur with everything said here. To understand the language of loss and be understood is invaluable. We normalized the rollercoaster of emotions for each other. And now, we embrace a resilient life through that support system. Thank you for this essential episode.

Answer 17

Going through an incredibly tough time after a divorce, health and financial issues and tragic loss of a friend in 6 months. I'm a skater from Sydney from back in the 90's and ended up moving into medical technology.
I just wanted to say thanks, Andrew, for getting me through another lonely week, mate. You give a lot of us sad souls a bit of hope, and with practical protocols I can do, even in this dark place is everything right now.
I don't think I'd be alive this month if it wasn't for your podcast brother. Keep up the good work ❤

Comments

Hi Ken sounds like you’ve had a nightmare time lately and I’m so sorry for your losses and troubles. Hang in there, things will get better in time. Just wanted to say hi from the UK

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Thanks brother, appreciate it ❤️‍

Answer 18

My dad died 10 months ago. It’s been insane. We held a celebration of life for him and that party went til late, the way my dad would’ve preferred it I think. We must bolster our faith systems to seek positivity within grief.

Answer 19

My wife is about to be tested for Huntington’s. We’ve been stuck in a space of potential grief for years. It’s been a journey of learning to accept the impermanence of life - nobody is guaranteed tomorrow, but it’s hard to embrace that idea.

Comments

Thank You for caring for her and loving her as you are doing. Be grateful she is still alive. I can’t speak for what to do after a loved one passes. I listen to these scientists who haven’t a clue about real grief, or know how to handle the horrors of tumors and convulsions, but write books and talk abundantly about navigating their wonder filled lives.

Answer 20

I am happy to have known everyone of the connections to my loved / beloved & am blessed beyond all expression of their individual selves, & say I remember each one of you & appreciation of you all being a part of my life/ me to carry you with me onward to become a continuously better version of me because of all of you.